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    • Describe the relationship between school-age development and behavior.
    • Explain boundaries and expectations and why they are important tools in promoting positive behavior.
    • Develop techniques for managing and guiding behavior in the school-age learning environment.




    Understanding Behavior and Development

    School-age children are busy developing their bodies and minds as they increase their independence and decrease their reliance on their families and teachers. With their growing level of independence, school-age children will also experience an increase in responsibility, choices and expectations. Most school-age children will have chores and tasks they are responsible for, such as cleaning their room, taking care of a pet, or helping with household chores. In the learning environment, they might have responsibilities such as cleaning up after themselves, putting materials away in the correct spots, and watering plants. The number of choices offered to school-age children and their awareness of what these choices entail will also increase. Children will begin to make decisions about their clothing, hairstyle, room décor, activities, and friendships. Developmentally, school-age children also become more aware of their emotions and feelings. They are able to understand what they feel and why they feel a certain way, and gain an increased control of their emotional reactions. (For more information on development, please refer to the Cognitive and Social-Emotional courses.)

    Typical for School-Age Children

    Similar to other areas of development, there are certain behaviors that are typical as children progress through developmental stages. Although these behaviors are often challenging adults, they are to be expected. Consider the examples of behaviors that are both developmentally appropriate and challenging in the table below and begin thinking about how you can prepare to respond appropriately to these behaviors:

    Age Group

    Behaviors that are developmentally appropriate (or expected) but may challenge adults

    Young School-Age

    (5 to 8 years)

    • Very concerned with fairness
    • Begins to notice differences between the sexes and may use sex differences as the basis for play decisions or excluding others from play (“No boys allowed”)
    • Lying or stretching the truth
    • “Tattling” or telling on others
    • “Cheating” at games or getting upset and not wanting to play

    Older School-Age

    (8 to 12 years)

    • Avoiding adults and preferring peers
    • Talking back
    • Experimenting with swear words and “adult” behaviors
    • Wanting to appear “cool” to peers

    Since school-age children are developmentally ready to start processing and handling their own emotions and feelings, they will experience higher expectations for their behavior. School-age children will be expected to behave in a way that is appropriate and safe for their environment, and developmentally appropriate for their age. If we think about behavior as a form of communication and revisit the American Academy of Pediatrics’ definition of behavior—“the conduct, actions, and words that children employ—a signal with which they express their thoughts, feelings, needs, and impulses”—then we can see how development and behavior go hand in hand. As school-age children begin to develop their individual personalities and have a world of choices, decisions, and opportunities available to them, they will start trying new and different ways of communicating their complex feelings and emotions. We see these forms of communication as behaviors. As a school-age staff member, it is your job to help children understand and meet their behavior expectations. You support positive behavior helping children to behave appropriately by setting boundaries and expectations and using guidance techniques to reinforce positive behaviors and to influence challenging ones.

    Supporting Positive Behavior: Setting Boundaries

    Boundaries are a positive way of helping school-age children understand what is expected of them. Boundaries can also be referred to as setting limits or expectations. In the physical sense, a boundary, such as a fence, gives a person a line that they should not cross. This is the same for behavior boundaries. You are setting the limit for the acceptable behavior standard in the learning environment. If a child goes beyond the “fence” they will be held accountable for their actions with a designated set of consequences. While boundaries may have been designed to limit challenging behaviors, they also allow children to have the confidence and freedom to take safe risks, explore, and make themselves accountable for their own behavior. Teaching children to hold themselves accountable for their behavior provides an important skill that they will need throughout their lifetime. Accountability means that a child is expected to justify his or her actions or decisions. Mastering this skill means children will be purposeful about their behaviors, actions, and choices and will not be afraid to admit a mistake or lapse in judgment.

    As a school-age staff member, you will set behavior expectations for your learning environment. It is important to include children in this process as much as possible. Allowing children to have input in their own behavior expectations will help them to hold themselves and their peers accountable. It also gives you a chance to make sure that the children fully understand what is expected of them. Some other aspects to keep in mind when setting boundaries and expectations are:

    • State the expectations clearly and in language that children can easily understand . Use vocabulary that is developmentally appropriate and be as clear as possible.
    • Make the expectations reasonable and achievable . Expectations and boundaries are designed to support positive behaviors, so they should be written to help children be successful.
    • Be consistent in the way the expectations are enforced . Hold all children accountable for their behavior in the same way. Be consistent by always following through with rewards or consequences as noted in the expectations.
    • Have a combination of broad and specific expectations . An example of a broad behavior expectation would be, “Respect yourself.” This one expectation can encompass many behaviors. You can also create very specific boundaries depending on the needs of the program or learning environment.
    • Be positive in the way you write the expectations . Always reinforce the positive behavior instead of focusing on the challenging one. For example, instead of “no yelling,” you could use “always use an appropriate volume.” This tells children the behavior you want to see, without using the word “no” or stating the challenging behavior.

    There are a variety of ways to write behavior expectations, and some programs have certain core values that are always included, so be sure to check with your trainer, coach, or supervisor for any program-specific lists. In the chart below, you will see four broad behavior expectations and how they correspond with the everyday behaviors you want to see in school-age children. You can use this as a guide when writing behavior expectations in your own learning environment. It may be helpful to use the broad expectations and then let the children brainstorm ideas for the everyday behaviors.

    Broad Behavior Expectation

    Everyday Behaviors

    Respect Yourself

    • Always try your best
    • Speak, act and dress appropriately
    • Be safe

    Respect Others

    • Keep your hands and feet to yourself
    • Be kind and considerate
    • Share materials and space
    • Recognize others’ achievements

    Respect the Environment

    • Clean up after yourself
    • Keep the environment clean and safe
    • Use equipment, furniture, and materials safely and appropriately

    Be Accountable

    • Follow behavior expectations
    • Believe in your actions
    • Admit when you’re wrong

    Supporting Positive Behavior: Guidance Techniques

    Guidance is the way you can resolve issues, direct behaviors and actions, and share advice, information, and knowledge in the learning environment. As a school-age staff member, you should use guidance techniques that support positive behavior and teach children how to demonstrate appropriate behaviors, resolve conflicts, and deal with life’s issues. The goal of all guidance techniques should be to promote positive behavior and reduce challenging behavior. The guidance techniques below are examples of commonly used techniques and approaches. Be sure to check with your trainer, coach, or supervisor for guidance policies and techniques used in your program.

    Proactive Guidance

    Proactive guidance is a “conscientious effort on the part of teachers to provide a classroom environment that allows students to be themselves, take risks, learn from mistakes, and understand how to take responsibility for their actions and feelings,” according to Louis Denti in Proactive Classroom Management. As a school-age staff member, you should strive to make this technique your guide in managing the behaviors in the learning environment. Using this guidance technique allows you to stop challenging behaviors, conflicts, and other issues before they start. By being proactive and meaningful about your plans and actions in the learning environment, you will create an atmosphere of mutual respect with a sense of community. Please refer to the Social course for more information on creating a sense of community within the school-age learning environment.

    Proactive Guidance: How will you use it?

    Proactive guidance is something you will use each day as a way to create a positive learning environment for school-age children. You will create schedules, routines, and transitions that are consistent, predictable, and appropriate. Having a routine that is clearly posted and easy to follow will help school-age children know what to expect and what their options are. Choice boards also allow children to pick their activity and be accountable for their schedule. These are examples of proactive guidance because they create a predicable routine for children, which will limit challenging behaviors, confusion and outbursts. You will learn more about routines and choice boards later in this course.

    Another way you will use proactive guidance is by learning the behavior patterns and triggers of the children in your program. It is important for you to spend time observing children so that you understand what events or personalities may upset them or cause them to act out or demonstrate a challenging behavior. You can help these children avoid challenging behaviors by working to stop them before they start. For example, you might notice that many of the children are irritable and seem to easily have conflicts with one another. To avoid any further challenging behavior, you might decide to bring the children outside to play, have an impromptu dance party, or play a program game. All of those activities will help to release energy and avoid conflict. Physical activity is always a great way to avoid challenging behavior. It is important to remember that children often are in a classroom setting during their school day and do not have many opportunities for free play. Allowing children time to run, play, chat, and relax will help to avoid challenging behaviors.

    In order for children to feel emotionally safe in the learning environment, you must work to eliminate bullying, name calling, and challenging peer pressure. You can do this by observing the daily interactions of the children, being aware of any drastic changes in personalities, and creating an atmosphere that encourages open discussion and sharing.

    Positive Reinforcement

    Using the positive reinforcement guidance technique, you will support appropriate behaviors by rewarding them in a positive way. The theory of positive reinforcement was developed by B.F. Skinner, a theorist who focused on behavior modification. This technique can be used in a variety of ways such as recognizing positive behaviors with encouragement, small tokens, or privileges. According to Skinner’s research, children who are recognized or rewarded for their positive behavior will continue to behave accordingly, while those children who were demonstrating challenging behaviors will attempt to change their behavior in an effort to receive the recognition or reward.

    Positive Reinforcement: How will you use it?

    Providing encouragement and recognition for positive behaviors is one of the most basic forms of positive reinforcement, and is usually yields the best outcomes. When children behave within the expectations and boundaries you have set for them, they should be given verbal encouragement and recognition. Some examples of positive reinforcement are:

    • Giving a nonverbal acknowledgment like a smile, nod, or thumbs up . For example, when a child is following everyday guidelines, like cleaning up after snack, you can acknowledge this by a quick smile or thumbs up.
    • Providing recognition for a job well done . For example, if you observe a child complete an art project or work hard to master tying her or his shoes, you can acknowledge this by saying what a great job they did. (“I love the way you kept working at tying your shoes—I am so proud of you!”)
    • Acknowledging an act of kindness . For example, you notice a child helping a friend clean up a mess, you can acknowledge this for the whole group to see: “Attention friends, Julio helped Daniel clean up the construction zone because he is a good friend. This is a great example of kindness—great job Julio!” However, it is important to know the individual personalities and temperaments of the children and youth in your care. Some children may prefer more private recognitions of their kindness.
    • Encouraging a positive behavior through verbal recognition . For example, when you know a child is working on a behavior that has been a challenge in the past, you want to provide encouragement when you observe their positive behavior. For example, “Louis, I noticed that you took turns with Elizabeth at the computer station today. I saw how happy Elizabeth was to work out that computer plan with you – keep up the good work!”

    The Self-Regulation Approach

    Self-regulation is a learning process that involves the development of a set of positive behaviors that affect one's learning, according to Barry Zimmerman in A Social Cognitive View of Self-Regulated Academic Learning (1989). These behaviors may not come naturally to children, but can be taught or learned (Zimmerman, 1994; Zimmerman, Bonner, & Kovatch, 1996). As a school-age staff member, it is important that you provide positive guidance that enables children to make their own decisions, solve problems and tell the difference between right and wrong. Self-regulation is an approach you can teach school-age children to help them learn how to respond and react to their environment and how to set goals for desired outcomes. This guidance technique also focuses on allowing children to determine their needs by interpreting their own emotions, thoughts, and environment. Teaching self-control allows children to guide their own paths to success by giving them tools and approaches to help them regulate their own behaviors.

    The Self­-Regulation Approach: How will you use it?

    You can help children learn how to use the self-regulation technique by using the following questions to encourage children to think about their desired outcome.

    • What is my goal?
    • What needs to be done to achieve my goal?
    • Why is my goal worth achieving?
    • How should I achieve my goal? Or what steps should I take?
    • What skills or resources do I need? Are there any tools that would help me?
    • Do I have these skills or resources? If not, how will I acquire them?

    Remember, a goal can be something like having a turn at a particular area, finishing a new book, or tying your shoes. Of course, they can also be more in depth, like learning a new skill, improving one’s health, or making a team. This approach will help you encourage children to make choices that will help them reach whatever their desired outcome or goal may be. You can use the questions above as a guide. For younger children, you may have to help them see the goals they share in everyday interactions, for example, “You said you really wanted to build a paper airplane that could fly across the playground. That sounds like a great goal for this week! What do you think could help you design a great plane?” Not all questions need to be answered for every goal. The diagram below will also help you to guide children before, during, and after the process.


    Before the Response
    • Self-Determined Goals & Standards

      Students determine goals to be achieved and standards for behavior

    During the Response
    • Self-Monitoring

      Student observe & monitor own performance.

    • Self-Instructions

      Students give selves instructions (either aloud or quietly) to help guide actions.

    After the Response
    • Self-Evaluation

      Students judge the quality of their performance

    • Self-Imposed Contingencies

      Students impose their own consequences for success or failure

    Consider these examples:

    Before the response

    During the response

    After the response

    Alicia currently wears Velcro tennis shoes. However, she is interested in getting some more “authentic” athletic shoes to play basketball in. Alicia’s mom states she must know how to tie her shoelaces before they purchase a pair. Alicia wants to learn to tie laces on tennis shoes so she can get the basketball shoes she wants.

    You help model how to tie laces and provide some materials for Alicia to practice.

    Alicia continues to practice with the materials you provide and observes the outcomes of her tries. She may say tips you provide, for example, “make two bunny ears” or “one loop and wrap around” out-loud to help guide her actions. She may also practice tying other people’s shoes to see how different laces work.

    Alicia judges the tightness of the knots she constructs, and how quickly she can tie and untie the laces. She informs her mom of her new skill.

    Together they purchase “real” athletic shoes with laces and Alicia experiences playing basketball in them.

    Ron saw a local competitive jump rope team at a recent community festival. He was impressed by the different moves and has decided he wants to try out for the younger team of 9-12 year olds.

    After discussing with Ron what materials and experiences may help him reach his goal, you help gather what is needed, perhaps identifying relevant books or websites and different sized jump ropes. You may also help coordinate a field trip or a special visitor that can provide an opportunity for Ron to learn skills from an experienced member of the jump rope team. You could also work with Ron to recruit other children who can help twirl the ropes so Ron can practice different tricks.

    Ron may track his progress by writing down the number and kind of successful tricks he completes each day. He may talk out-loud to help him maintain rhythm, or to count the beat of music if he uses this for practice.

    After practicing individual moves for several weeks, Ron puts together a routine and practices this until he can do it multiple times with no errors. He judges his own success when he is able to do his routine in front of the other children in the program, with minimal mistakes (one mis-jump).

    Ron is now ready to try out for the team. Although he makes the first round of competition, he does not make the second. Although he is disappointed, the experienced jump rope members comment on his high level of skill and commitment. They give him some detailed feedback on how to improve. You sit down with Ron to help him plan for next steps so he can continue to pursue this goal.

    Strategies to Avoid When Dealing with Challenging Behaviors

    You and all the staff members in your program have a professional responsibility to keep children safe from harm. This includes emotional, psychological, and mental harm. There are certain types of behaviors (often used in the name of “punishment”) that have the potential to inflict harm and model aggression. When staff members use aggressive techniques with children, they and their families learn that aggressive responses to behavior are OK. That is not the message to send children and families. The following practices are harmful:

    • Corporal punishment : You may not, under any circumstances, strike, hit, whip, spank, or use any other form of physical punishment on a child of any age.
    • Withholding physical needs : You may not, under any circumstances, withhold food, sleep, physical activity or other needs, like toileting, from a child as punishment.
    • Yelling, shaming, belittling , or threatening a child: You may not, under any circumstances, intentionally make a child fear for his or her physical or psychological safety. Staff may not call children hurtful names, threaten children, or make children feel shame.
    • Isolating a child : You may not punish a child by leaving him or her alone (e.g., leaving a child on the playground alone because he did not line up with the group) or by putting the child in “time out” in an enclosed space like a closet, restroom, or cardboard box.
    • Binding or restricting a child’s movements : You may not punish a child by preventing him or her from being able to move or speak (e.g., covering a child’s mouth or hands with tape).

    In addition, the Council on Accreditation’s Standards for Child and Youth Development Programs, prohibits negative approaches to behavior management, including, but not limited to:

    • corporal punishment
    • aversive stimuli
    • withholding nutrition or hydration
    • inflicting physical or psychological pain
    • demeaning, shaming, or degrading language or activities
    • unnecessarily punitive restrictions
    • forced physical exercise to eliminate behaviors
    • punitive work assignments
    • punishment by peers
    • group punishment or discipline for individual behavior

    Your program has a Guidance and Touch policy. In the Identification and Reporting Child Abuse and Neglect course, you will learn more about this policy.


    Guidance: Boundaries

    Watch this video to learn how boundaries can be used to support positive behavior.

    Guidance: Promoting Positive Behavior

    Watch this video to learn how guidance can help promote positive behavior.


    As a school-age staff member, it is important for you to always model the behaviors you expect to see in children.

    • Arrive on time, meet appropriate dress codes, and always be on task.
    • Show the same level of respect for all children.
    • Demonstrate accountability by following through with promises, being consistent, and admitting mistakes or errors. Show children that it is okay to make mistakes, and that you can always learn from them.
    • Model “making things right” when you do make mistakes or errors. Encourage children to do the same when they intentionally or accidently hurt another person, their work or property.
    • Maintain a positive attitude. Provide positive feedback and encouragement to children.
    • Model social skills by making eye contact, using manners, and showing empathy.



    As a school-age staff member, your hope is that children will work together to create a positive learning environment. One way you can help achieve this goal is by providing appropriate encouragement when children make efforts to follow the behavior expectations and to be a part of the learning community. Review this website for additional information on encouragement versus praise; it contains advice regarding how to best “accentuate the positive,” see: Then, download and print the Providing Encouragement activity and share your completed work with your trainer, coach, or supervisor.



    Setting behavior boundaries and expectations are the first steps toward using positive and proactive guidance in the learning environment. Download and print the Apply: Setting Boundaries activity. Please share your finished work with your supervisor, trainer, or coach.


    Developmentally appropriate practiceAn approach to teaching grounded in the research on how young children develop and learn and in what is known about effective early education practices. These practices should be flexible to allow for differences between children in skills, interests, and characteristics




    Finish this statement: Proactive guidance is…


    True or False? School-age children do not respond well to positive reinforcement.


    Eleven-year-old Nora has started using swear words and talking back occasionally. As a school-age staff member, how do you respond?

    References & Resources

    Council on Accreditation. (2019). Standards for Child and Youth Development (CYD) Programs. Retrieved from

    Denti, Louis. Proactive Classroom Management. Crowin Publishing. 2012.

    Gartrell, D. (2012). Education for a Civil Society: How Guidance Teaches Young Children Democratic Life Skills. National Association for the Education of Young Children.

    Hearron, P. F., & Hildebrand, V. (2013). Guiding Young Children. Pearson Higher Ed.

    Gartrell, D. (2012). Guidance Matters: From Rules to Guidelines. National Association for the Education of Young Children. Retrieved from: 

    Texas Child Care Quarterly. (2007). Back to Basics: Child guidance: School-agers. Texas Child Care, Summer 31(1). Contents available at

    Zimmerman, B. J. (1994). Dimensions of academic self-regulation: A conceptual framework for education. In D. H. Schunk & B. J. Zimmerman (Eds.), Self-regulation of learning and performance: Issues and educational implications (pp. 3-21). Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.

    Zimmerman, B. J., Bonner, S., & Kovatch, R. (1996). Developing self-regulated academic learning. Journal of Educational Psychology, 81, 329-339.